I think it’s worth starting with what happened Friday night.
I was just fascinated by the magnitude of it.
It is hard not to get a little emotional and full of pride watching the four astronauts come home from Artemis II and thinking about what they accomplished together.
I found myself glued to the TV Friday night, just taking it in. While I know there will be a lot said about a moment like this and there should be, it's extraordinary, I wasn't watching it thinking about leadership lessons or content.
But something about it stayed with me. Not just what we see.
But everything behind it.
The trust and preparation.
The clarity of roles.
The number of people involved who will never be known publicly but were critical to making it work.
And while most of us are not operating at that level of precision, it does make you pause and consider what is possible when the right people are in place, working toward something shared, and showing up in a way that doesn't require constant pushing.
That's the part that stayed with me.
In a business, I see something very different play out more often than not.
Leaders spending a lot of time feeling frustrated with their teams.
Because they aren't showing up in the way the leader hoped they would. There's more follow-up than expected, more reminding, more stepping in. Things that feel like they should be handled... aren't. Over time, it starts to feel heavier than it should.
I've been there.
And for a long time, I thought it meant I needed to get better at managing, communicating, motivating... all the things we tend to default to when something isn't clicking with people.
But over time, and after building a lot of teams, what I've found is that it usually comes back to something much simpler, and honestly, much harder to look at.
It's either who you have on the team...
Or how you're leading them.
Sometimes both.
And this is where I see a lot of leaders get stuck.
Because those two things can look the same on the surface.
Someone isn’t stepping up… and the instinct is to manage it better, communicate more, or push harder.
But before you do that, you have to know which one you're dealing with.
When someone is truly aligned with a role, there's a baseline way they show up that doesn't require constant pushing.
They take ownership in a way that's noticeable. They recover when things go sideways. They don't wait for every next instruction. It doesn't mean they don't need guidance or development, but there's something steady in how they operate.
And when that's not there, no amount of managing really replaces it. It just create more involvement from the leader.
I remember a point where I shifted how I looked at hiring. I stopped focusing so much on whether someone had done the exact job before and started paying more attention to who they were and how they moved through their days.
What are they about?
What do they really want from a role like this?
How do they respond when things don't go well?
What are they known for by the people around them?
Those answers told me a lot more about how they would show up than their resume ever did.
At the same time, I had to look at myself too.
Because I've also seen really strong people start to pull back... not because they weren't capable, but because of how they were being led.
Stepping in too quickly.
Over-explaining.
Not being fully clear on what was theirs to own.
Or unintentionally making it easier for them to wait instead of step up.
None of that is intentional, but it changes how people operate over time.
This is the part that I think gets overlooked.
Leaders end up trying to motivate people who either aren't the right fit, or who are in an environment where ownership isn't fully required.
So they push more.
And the more they push, the more everything runs through them.
At some point, it's worth stepping back and asking a different question.
Not "how do I get more out of my team?"
But "what is actually creating the gap here?"
Is it who is in the role?
Is it what I've been tolerating?
Is it how I'm showing up as a leader?
When those things start to come into alignment, something shifts.
You don't have to push as much.
You're not carrying as much.
And the team starts to move in a way that feels more natural, not forced.
That's when leadership starts to feel different.
And a lot more sustainable.
This is where we're spending time inside the Collective this month as we get into team leadership. Not from a tactical standpoint but really looking at what's underneath how teams operate and why they either create momentum... or friction.
If your team has been feeling heavier than it should, this is usually where I would start.
And if this feels like a lot, it can be... especially when you've been trying to solve the wrong thing for a while.
The good news is once you see what's actually underneath it, it's often much simpler to shift than it felt before.
The 5 C's of Wellbeing
When everything feels like "too much", the answer usually isn't doing more, it's coming back to what actually matters.
Think of your wellbeing through five simple lenses:
Clarity
Mental clutter is exhausting.
Knowing what matters and what doesn't, frees up more energy than any routine ever will.
Capacity
You can't operate at full output all the time.
Your wellbeing depends on honoring your limits, not constantly pushing past them.
Consistency
It's not what you do once, it's what you return to.
Small, repeatable habits will always outperform occasional "perfect" days.
Connection
With people, with yourself, with your life.
Disconnection is often the root of feeling off, even if everything "looks fine" on the outside.
Control (or Choice)
Not everything is in your control, but more is in your influence than you think. Your wellbeing shifts the moment you start making intentional choices instead of reactive ones.
You don't need a full reset.
You need a few steady anchors.
Ways to Work With Modwellship
Executive Advisory
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